God’s Grace Teaches Us to Say ‘No’

” For the grace of God that brings salvation…teaches us to say “No”… [Titus 2:11]

To grow anything requires order…have you ever tried to plant something in the ground and then expect it to grow…no preparation…no fertilizer…no thought of sun or shade?  I have…it doesn’t work, the poor plant struggles and at best is weak and crippled and at worst dies.  However when there is knowledge and application, growth follows in an orderly fashion.  Likewise, when there is proper planning, preparation, and perseverance, personal leadership grows.

Saying no to the quick fix, get it over with, need it now, kind of thinking is not the faith of effective leadership.  Saying no requires confidence in the knowledge that your decisions are based upon.  More than anything else, it requires the grace which is the power of God to take a stand.  When Joseph said no to temptation he was given a prison sentence, but God’s grace brought a favored position and proved  leadership-faith is always faithful.   [Genesis 39:8-9]

Peter understood the deception of those who twist the Scriptures to fit themselves.  His warning was sound.  “But you, friends, are well-warned.  Be on guard lest you lose your footing and get swept off your feet by these lawless and loose-talking teachers.  Grow in grace and understanding of our Master and Savior. “ [2 Peter 3:18 The Message] God’s grace has been given to keep us from sin, not just forgive us of our sin.

When the God of all Grace is honored, we are saved from sin rather than swept away by it.

Servant Leadership

“Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave — just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matt 20:26-28).

A rider on horseback, many years ago, came upon a squad of soldiers who were trying to move a heavy piece of timber. A corporal stood by, giving lordly orders to “heave.” But the piece of timber was a trifle too heavy for the squad.

“Why don’t you help them?” asked the quiet man on the horse, addressing the important corporal.

“Me? Why, I’m a corporal, sir!” Dismounting, the stranger carefully took his place with the soldiers.

“Now, all together boys — heave!” he said. And the big piece of timber slid into place. The stranger mounted his horse and addressed the corporal.

“The next time you have a piece of timber for your men to handle, corporal, send for the Commander-in-Chief.”

The horseman was George Washington, the first American president.

Whenever someone mentions your name does the word “servant” come to their mind? Jesus modeled servanthood to twelve young men and changed the world. If you want to see others become servants, you must model it yourself. George Washington was a great example of a Christian leader who was a great soldier and servant to those he led. No wonder God used this great servant to establish a new nation.

Moses was also a great leader of men. The Bible says that Moses was the most humble man on earth. That is why God could use him to lead hundreds of thousands out of slavery into the Promised Land.

Pray that God makes you a great humble servant leader of others.

 

Reprinted by permission from the author. Os Hillman is an international speaker and author of more than 10 books on workplace calling. To learn more, visit http://www.MarketplaceLeaders.org

Leaving with Integrity

 

All changes are more or less tinged with melancholy, for what we are leaving behind is part of ourselves.

-Amelia Barr

The year was 1996.  We were in transition from the state of California to the state of Texas because of a job that had ended.  I’ll never forget crossing the state line between California into Arizona and looking in the rear-view mirror.  Tears ran down my face as I saw the last California palm tree I would see for many years to come.

Last night a friend of mine said goodbye to his leadership group. He repeatedly said to those gathered, “This is a good thing. I don’t know why I’m crying!”  I was instantly taken back to that image of the palm tree waving us goodbye.  Just like my friend, I knew it was a good move despite the conflict I felt inside.

Leaving is necessary to allow growth to take place, build character, when a relationship is unhealthy, or if you’re stuck in a job that limits your creativity.  People leave for all kinds of reasons and not all are negative.  I suggest the following six steps to help navigate your season of leaving:

• Pray earnestly for favor and wisdom to successfully navigate the transition.
• Find moments to be alone and meditate on the Word of God. Nothing else will give you more clarity and bring you more peace about the move than the Bible.
• Keep yourself accountable to your mentors.
• Calendar the date as soon as you have confirmation. Do not leave things to the last minute–this creates unwanted stress in an already stressful situation.
• Don’t burn any bridges regardless of the circumstances for your departure. Honor the relationships you leave behind.
• Communicate with your family. Remember you are not the only one affected by the move. Give your family an opportunity to express their feelings.

John 14: 25-27; 29-31 (The Message) gives us words of encouragement:

^25-27“I’m telling you these things while I’m still living with you. The Friend, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send at my request, will make everything plain to you. He will remind you of all the things I have told you. I’m leaving you well and whole. That’s my parting gift to you. Peace. I don’t leave you the way you’re used to being left—feeling abandoned, bereft. So don’t be upset. Don’t be distraught. ^29-31“I’ve told you this ahead of time, before it happens, so that when it does happen, the confirmation will deepen your belief in me. …I am carrying out my Father’s instructions right down to the last detail…Get up. Let’s go. It’s time to leave here.”

Best Mentoring Books

Back in August, reader Julie David emailed asking for MMCW’s recommendation for the best book on Christian women mentoring other Christian women. This sparked a week long discussion of our favorite mentoring and leadership books with Julie via email. Here’s a list of books we have personally read and used in no particular order.

Page Hughes recommends:
The greatest mentors in the Bible: 32 relationships God used to change the world: A Devotional Guide
by Tim Elmore
A devotion guide leading you through 32 mentoring relationships throughout the Bible.  Lots of fun to see how God has used personal relationships to encourage and inspire His children throughout the Bible and through the years since.

Table for Two: Doing Life and Savoring Scriptures Together by Amy Pierson and Mona Cowan
I am presently working through this mentoring book. This mentoring book is written by two ladies from Prestonwood Baptist church in Texas. Written to mentor teens, it’s perfect for women too.

Kellie Renfroe recommends:
Guardians of the Gate: Enriching Your Life Through Spiritual Mentoring by Ann Platz
I heard Ms. Platz years ago at a mentoring luncheon in Atlanta and fell in love with her Southern charm and humor. She is a mentor’s mentor filled with wisdom and continually points readers to the Bible. I love the chapter about spiritual gatekeepers.

A Pebble in the Pond: The Ripple Effect : Leadership Skills Every Woman Can Achieve by Julie Baker
Wonderful book for those involved in leadership and mentoring leaders. Ms. Baker covers topics from basic leadership concerns to more complex subjects in an easy-to-read style that lends itself to discussion.

A Woman’s High Calling by Elizabeth George
Excellent meat-and-potatoes study of “twelves” essential to a godly woman’s life. Mrs. George cuts no corners and tells it straight–covering everything  from setting priorities to dealing with negative situations.

Breaking Free
by Beth Moore
Fabulous Bible study for small groups or individual use, especially for abuse survivors and for those who have issues with addictions, boundaries, relationship problems. I highly recommend this study for every woman–it should be required reading! Available in hardback book, I recommend the indepth study with the workbook along with either the audio CDs or the Leader’s Kit with DVDs.

Molly Evert recommends:
The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace for marriage mentoring.

The Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson for mentoring a younger mom.

Vicki Huffman recommends:
Women Mentoring Women by Vickie Kraft

Vickie Kraft was one of the first leaders in women’s ministry to write about the need for women to mentor women.  This book is a classic on the subject.

Marriage Miracle by Bob and Cheryl Moeller
I am taking individual and small groups of women through this book Bob and I wrote. Although the word marriage is in the title, it’s for singles too. It contains scripture, principles, and stories for softening one’s heart. It also has a prayer and discussion question section at the end of each chapter. At the end of the book are practical exams, grids, worksheets, and prayer guides that, if used with the searchlight of the Holy Spirit, will soften your heart.

What are your favorite mentoring / leadership books?

What’s Your Leadership Style?

Have you ever wondered what type of leader you are?

Do you have a pioneering style or do your strengths lie in strategic leadership? Maybe it is administration, team building, or encouraging leadership.

When we know our natural leadership bent, it brings clarity and greater understanding of the uniqueness God has placed within us to serve Him. God has given those with leadership ability various strengths, all of which are important within the Body of Christ.

Years ago I came across the The Teal Leadership Style Indicator online. It’s a free tool that can put a name and give a description to what you probably already know concerning your leadership style.

Based on questions given and answered on the website, the indicator accesses natural leadership style across five different areas: pioneering leadership, strategic leadership, management/administration leadership, team leadership, and encouraging leadership.

Once complete, a summery is emailed to you giving a score in each area plus a description of what each type of leadership style looks like. The site is an excellent source of additional leadership material too.

Click here to begin. When you’re done, come back and let me know what you think!

Keys To Women’s Ministry Success

“The fruit of righteous is a tree of life. And he who wins souls is wise.” Proverbs 11:30

Key #1: Consider Christ
Jesus ministered to masses. He molded and developed 12 men and challenged them to carry His message to the ends of the earth. The ministry of Jesus changed the world! We can learn everything we need to have a successful ministry by looking at the practical ways Christ conducted His earthly ministry.

How can we be like Christ?
* Define your purpose.
*Share your passion.
*Seek your people (develop a team of leaders).

Key #2: Converse with Christ
Jesus spent a great deal of time in prayer. He prayed for those that He was molding and building. He prayed for those who would come to know Him in the future. Prayer is the key to witnessing God’s productive power in your ministry.

How should we pray?
* Bathe everything in prayer.
* Pray for the small things and the big things.

Key #3: Compel them to come
Jesus called many to drop everything and follow Him. His invitation was clear and compelling.

How can we compel others to join us in following after God?
*Advertise your events in print and by word of mouth:  invite, invite, invite!
* Canvas the community.
* Invite other churches.

Key #4: Communicate constantly
Jesus used every opportunity to reach out and communicate with others. He not only spoke to and taught people; He was a Master at listening to their hearts.

How should we communicate?
* Write letters and newsletters monthly.
* Send cards for encouragement.
* Make calls and send emails.

Key #5: Compassionate concern
The compassion of Christ was evident in every move He made. He reached out to the poor and broken. He was patient with those who did not understand. He worked among the hurting to make a difference in their lives and to share the love of His Father in a real and tangible way. Everywhere we turn, people are hurting. We are called to minister.

How can we demonstrate compassion?
* Look for needs.
* Listen closely and actively. (Focus on the person speaking.)
* Pray immediately with them (out loud).

Key #6: Coach your leaders
Jesus worked with the twelve to give them the boldness and confidence that they needed to go out and share His message. He taught them as they walked the dusty roads together. He demonstrated how to minister as the twelve looked on. He poured Himself into these men in order to teach them to touch the lives of others for the Kingdom.

How can we develop our leaders?
* Choose prayerfully. (Ask God to help you match gifts to service.)
* Disciple diligently.
* Challenge constantly.

Key #7: Consistently teach the Word
The most important key to having ministry success is to effectively and consistently teach the Word of God. Jesus spoke the words of the Father. He spoke the message of the Gospel wherever He went.

How can we consistently teach His Word?
* Encourage individual study.
* Let every event draw people to the Word. (Use a theme verse.)
* Celebrate growth.

Stephanie Little, Guest Writer

You are a Change Agent

”And be not conformed to this world…be transformed…prove what is good…” [Romans 12:2]

Did you ever stop to think that the transforming power of God can only be released through change? Life is measured by the moment by moment decisions we make to move away from the shoreline of yesterday.

The following quote by a friend seems to capture with startling clarity the culture we live in and the difficulties we have in becoming the change agents of today’s culture.

“The world we live in is drunk with opinions. There are so many that they crowd around us like bottles on the shelves of an old liquor shop. We reel down our own roads unable to distinguish a tree from a lamppost, unable even to walk a straight line. On reaching the harbor of our lives, we fail to recognize the clear waters of the open sea, staring instead at the muddy shores and wonder where the fresh water has gone…” [B. Frampton CEO-BeeFrampton Co.]

Are you managing change—or is change managing you? Change is not just something put on us by the world. By the very nature of the new birth we become change agents in the world in which we live. In this climate of confusion and in answer to our questions, we have the following responsibilities to ourselves and to the world:

1) To continually be renewed according to God’s Word.

2) To provide an environment for personal change and spiritual growth.

3) To call for change and be leaders of change in our society.

4) To minister to a society which is collapsing under the burden of unmanaged and destructive change.

Related Reading: Romans 12:1-2 Psalm 45

To leave a comment:

• If you are reading this post in email form, click the article headline. This will take you to the article on MMCW’s website.
• Scroll down until you see the box entitled ‘Speak Your Mind’.
• Enter your name, email (it will not be published) and your website or blogsite if you have one (you do not have to have one).
• Click on the big empty space and then begin typing your comments.
• When you are done, click ‘submit comment’.  That’s it!  We look forward to hearing from YOU!

Diane Hale
For the past 30 years, Diane has served as evangelist, trainer, teacher, mentor, and consultant for churches of many denominations.
http://dianehale.net/

Strategic Thinking

But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed [Luke 5:16]

Sometimes the noise and confusion of this 21st century is so great we don’t even know what questions to ask and, without the right questions, we never get the right answer. Just when you think you have the answer, the question changes. Maybe this will help.

In their excellent book on leadership, Hope is Not a Method, General G. Sullivan and Michael Harper tell a remarkable story about Lt. H. Moore in Vietnam. Lt. Moore’s battalion was surrounded by the Viet Cong and was outnumbered five to one. Moore’s troops fought with remarkable bravery for 4 or 5 straight days. Eventually, both sides claimed victory.

In the extensive debriefing after the battle, it was reported that from time to time Moore seemed to just withdraw—blocking everything and everyone out. When his concerned superiors questioned him about his behavior, Moore replied that he was in fact trying to block everything out so that he could ask himself the following three questions: 1) What is happening? 2) What is not happening? 3) What can I do to influence this action? These three questions went on to become a simple but effective grid for the U.S. Army’s strategic thinking. Obviously, Jesus had the same problem and solution at times–to withdraw. As a soldier in the army of God, this is good strategic thinking for us to follow whenever the battle rages.

Remember if the battle is on and you are struggling: 1) Draw aside with Jesus. 2) Block out everything and everyone. 3) Ask these three questions and you will be amazed at the wisdom and clarity of decisions you make.

Related Reading: James 1:5 Proverbs 22:17-19.

To leave a comment:

• If you are reading this post in email form, click the article headline. This will take you to the article on MMCW’s website.
• Scroll down until you see the box entitled ‘Speak Your Mind’.
• Enter your name, email (it will not be published) and your website or blogsite if you have one (you do not have to have one).
• Click on the big empty space and then begin typing your comments.
• When you are done, click ‘submit comment’.  That’s it!  We look forward to hearing from YOU!

Diane Hale
For the past 30 years, Diane has served as evangelist, trainer, teacher, mentor, and consultant for churches of many denominations.
http://dianehale.net/

You’ve Got Mail

Is your inbox overflowing?

How does a busy woman stay on top of email without falling beneath its weight and volume? Here are a few quick and fast rules to control inbox clutter instead of it controlling you.

* Delete all junk email without opening. Do not waste your time.

* Touch an email only once if possible. Do you recall this tip from snail mail organization? It works the same for cyber mail too. If the email requires thought or additional time to gather information, respond with a quick reply. Some advise closing the email and letting it sit with no response until you are ready. This is ignoring the issue and while not professional, it will just result in further problems down the road. Even if it involves a difficult situation, a quick response can be as simple as:

“Thank you for your email. Let me think on this issue and get back with you in _______.”

Be honest and state your response time in terms of hours, days, or months. Save the email as new and move on to the next one. The sender will appreciate your courtesy and you will have the time you need.

* When composing a difficult email never, ever put any address in the Send To box other than your own. How many horror stories have we heard of entire address books receiving private correspondence or someone receiving an email that was more about letting off steam than finding a solution? By placing your email address in the Send To box you will safeguard against any slip. It will allow you the time to compose, edit, and tweak priority emails without worry. Any slip will find the email back in your inbox and not everyone else’s.

* When time is tight, save all blog and newsletter emails to folder called To Read. This will clean out your email box and place reading material in one location for easy retrieval.

* If email requires the input of others who are in the information loop, save time by copying your reply to those involved instead composing numerous separate emails.

By responding quickly and using the delete button liberally, you will bring order to a overflowing inbox and put yourself back in charge.

Practice is Over–It’s Time to Start Leading

When I worked for a printing company I was asked to learn a new part of the business–stripping. No, not that kind of stripping. This is the process of taking artwork, making a negative, and preparing it to be made into a metal plate for the printing press.

During my training period my supervisor would say, ‘Here Kellie, practice on this negative and I’ll check it.’ Slowly she gave me more and more work, but continued to use the word practice. As a result I did not see myself as having mastered the skill–I was in a perpetual state of learning. One day a frustrated co-worker (who wanted to relinquish this pre-press job to me) said, ‘Well when’s practice work going to be over?’ I was embarrassed and I think my supervisor was too. She had failed to move me from practicing to taking full
responsibility for the job.

In the arena of leadership it is easy to fall into a continual state of learning without fully stepping into the responsibility. There comes a time to close the leadership books and pull back on conference attendance to concentrate on actually leading. Whether it is ministry or marketplace endeavors, the key to leadership is leading.

Practice happens on the job with success and failure. It’s easy to depend too heavily on others or even put off taking the full reins of leadership when we are new and uncertain. A period of acclimating to a new position is understandable but as leaders our eyes must be on the big picture of full leadership. The longer a leader avoids full responsibility, the more discouraged and even frustrated those in our organization will become. Whether in the ministry or marketplace, the Lord has given us the power of His Holy Spirit to direct and lead us. All too often in the early days of leadership, it is easy to depend on the seminars and books for direction. The problem is the more we depend on learning about leadership in place of on-the-job training, we can easily replace the Lord’s voice with the drive to mimic others who have realized leadership success.

To avoid falling into the busyness trap of always learning and never leading, keep these points in mind.

Keep God first. God is our supreme authority. He has given us His Word to guide us daily. Prayer is the most important thing a leader can do. If God is not directing, then do not do it. And do not move until He does. Study the life of Daniel who would serve no other God.
Despise God’s Word and find yourself in trouble. Obey it and succeed. Proverbs 13:13 (NLB)

Be humble. Probably the number one stumbling block for leaders is pride. It is deadly in leadership. The godly characteristic to have is humbleness. True leaders are those who do not trumpet themselves. Study the life of Joseph. As a young man he was a prideful tattle-tell. Start out with humbleness!
Pride leads to arguments; be humble, take advice and become wise. Proverbs 13:10 (NLB)

Work. Nehemiah is an excellent example of godly leadership. Not only did God give him the strategy for rebuilding the wall, but Nehemiah rolled up his sleeves and worked along-side the people. In the marketplace or church ministry, people will only follow leaders who lead by example. Setting yourself apart from the people you lead will cause them to remove you as their leader emotionally or physically in the long run.
Do you know a hard-working man? He shall be successful and stand before kings!
Proverbs 22:29 (NLB)

Avoid yes people. The natural inclination is to surround ourselves with those who will cheer us on at all costs. There is a place for those people in our lives, but when it comes to leadership the qualifications for an inner circle must be honesty and accountability. I learned this the hard way early on when I overheard a team member say they could get me to do what they wanted in a situation because I always listened to them. Yes people have underlying motives such as pride, control issues, deception, flattery, or maybe their own agenda. If you only get high fives and pats-on-the-back, it’s probably time to find a new inner circle. Seek the wisdom of those who are older, wiser, and have already walked the road you are on. If you are married, listen to your spouse. Our spouses will tell us the truth–whether we like it or not–that can protect us and help us to avoid problems.
If you profit from constructive criticism you will be elected to the wise men’s hall of fame. But to reject criticism is to harm yourself and your own best interests. Humility and reverence for the Lord will make you both wise and honored. Proverbs 15:31-33 (NLB)

Know who you are leading. Pretending your group is a different set of people does not work. The Lord placed those we lead with us for a reason. Get to know them and petition the Lord on their behalf. As leaders we should be their biggest cheerleader and intercessor. In the marketplace this could be a sales team of 10 to 12, in the ministry it could be a women’s group of several hundred. Get to know them all. The old adage is true: people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.
A true friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need. Proverbs 17:17 (NLB)
Kind words are like honey–enjoyable and healthful. Proverbs 16:24 (NLB)

Leadership is both a marvelous gift and awesome responsibility. As leaders our focus must be on doing God’s work and not dragging ourselves or our organization down by not stepping fully into our role as leaders.

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