10 Ways to Greater Family Intimacy

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1. Read the Bible aloud to your kids.
Let them hear your voice and daddy’s voice. Missionary biographies, stories of great Christians, and stories with people of strong character.
“Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Matthew 19:14

2.  Slow down and talk.
Draw a bath for your young child and sit on a towel on the floor and listen. Let them tell you about their day and treat them to a short story from your childhood.
that He will never leave us or forsake us.” Hebrews 13:5

3. Begin Family Traditions that don’t cost money.
Example: Wrap some Christmas ornaments after Christmas. When you open Christmas decoration boxes next year there will be oohhhs and aahhs.
For God hat not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” II Timothy 1:7

4. No more Herd Mentality.
Children are not a herd; every hour cannot be spent herding a group. Plan intentional once a month one-on-one time with each child.
One-on-one with first child with dad. One-on-one with first child with mom. One-on-one with first child, dad, and mom.
One-on-one with second child with dad. One-on-one with second child with mom. One-on-one with second child, dad, and mom.
” I will give them one heart and one way, that they may fear me forever for their own good and the good of their children after them.” Jeremiah 32:39

5. Your Church is a Steak and Lobster Fest.
Be the church you want to attend. To children, complaining about church on the phone, in front of them, or to others is like complaining in front of them about God. They can’t separate out the difference and is there a difference?
”And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it.” Matthew 16:18

6. 10 times a day give a hug and/or kiss to your husband and kids.
“Love and faithfulness meet together; righteousness and peace kiss each other.”
Psalm 85:9-11

7. Place Two pictures of each child on their bed stand
Photo #1: Family photo. A family photo reminds them they are included and belong to a loving family.
Photo #2: “I am capable” photo. A picture of child’s sporting endeavors, favorite hobby, or goal (dressed as a policeman for example).
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” John 13:34

8. Decide today you can’t have it all.
Time is the new wealth. Life does not consist of an abundance of things, no one wants to end up relationship poor, especially with loved ones. How do you find contentment? All it will cost you is your misery.
For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors.” 1 Peter 1:18

9. Be the over-the-top parent where it really matters.
”I am your servant; give me discernment that I may understand your statutes.” Psalm 119:125

10. Make your home a house of prayer.
Your home can be Bethel–the House of God. Praying parents have stronger marriages, which is the greatest gift you can give your children.
“Then God said to Jacob, “Go up to Bethel and settle there, and build an altar there to God, who appeared to you when you were fleeing from your brother Esau.”
”So Jacob said to his household and to all who were with him, “Get rid of the foreign gods you have with you, and purify yourselves and change your clothes. 3 Then come, let us go up to Bethel, where I will build an altar to God, who answered me in the day of my distress and who has been with me wherever I have gone.” Genesis 35:1-3

Can you change your world, home, mothering in one hour? Yes, you can!
What are some steps that can start today to change a chaotic family?

Ask these questions:
Why are you busy? What are you busy with?
Are you a victim of your own success? Are you a victim of peer pressure?
Are you the adult?
Are you good at making excuses? Are you hopeless, helpless?
Are you making the Error of Fatalism (a pagan religion)?

1. Set up a family calendar.
Intentionally schedule family time with God, spouse, family (individually and as a group), church (including church-related activities and family outreach). Setting aside family time weekly to be home together (not on the phone, computer, or texting) will work to draw one another together.
2. Schedule Mama & Papa dates and intimacy.
3. Schedule free time.
“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.” Colossians 4:2

What are your family-favorite ideas for drawing closer together in 2013?

Cheryl Moeller is a Christian author, conference speaker, syndicated humor columnist, homemaker, cookbook writer, and blogger. Married for 33 ½ years to Robert, they have 6 children, 1 daughter-in-law, and 1 very handsome grandson. Visit her blogs: http://momlaughs.blogspot.com/ and http://bobandcherylmoeller.com/ and http://writingmentor.blogspot.com/.

Reading God’s Story Schedule today, 1/14/13: A day of prayer and meditation on the past week’s reading.

Join hosts Page and Cindy on Facebook where we are discussing today’s reading. PLEASE NOTE: We are no longer using the You Version Group to discuss the daily readings. Page and Cindy found an easier way by setting up a Facebook Group. Everyone is invited to join by going to https://www.facebook.com/groups/316067615171001/ and clicking the ‘Join Group’ button. As of 1/10/13 we have 400+ women reading and discussing Scripture together! Join us and invite your friends too!

About Cheryl Moeller

Cheryl Moeller has been married to her best friend Bob for 30 years. They are the parents of six children, one son-in-law, and three lively dogs. She uses her over-the-counter-top stand up comedy at women's groups and retreats, prays like it's her full-time job, writes a syndicated humor column, blogs about life with lots of kids at www.momlaughs.blogspot.com, and authors books such as Keep Courting: 100 Ways to Keep Courting After Marriage (purchase on their website) and Marriage Miracle (Harvest House 2010). Bob and Cheryl's passion is to connect two hearts for a lifetime. They have co-founded For Better For Worse For Keeps Ministries www.bobandcherylmoeller.com.

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  1. I love this post, Cheryl. These are great ideas that our family can implement immediately.

    When I was little, my family would have church services at home. We would sing songs–just mom, dad, my brother and me–with tambourines and make instruments. We would read the Bible, and dad would do a short devotion. Good memories. 🙂


  2. Thanks for the reminder of having family photos in the children’s rooms. Such an encouragement to see everyone together and a reminder of our love for one another — especially when someone has been quarrelsome! I’m the queen of buying frames and never putting photos in. Adding family pics this week to everyone’s room!

  3. Thankyou for the ideas! The church one really hit home, I am currently attending a church with my family although its not my favorite and I don’t agree with them in all aspects I go because its the church my husband will attend. I have found myself complaining about it. I am going to with Gods strength be the church that I want.