My husband has faults. His work kept him from home for much of our marriage. He snores. Our ideas of clean are different. Our interests clash. There are times it seems we have less in common than black and white.
Slowly I became discontent, lonely and tired.
It was difficult when I’d be wheeling my garbage to the street at the same time a male neighbor was. He must be such a great husband. He takes out the trash, I’d think .
When my kids and I would go over to a friend’s house, and I’d see her husband playing with my kids, pushing them on swings, teaching them a game, or making them laugh, I’d feel pain deep in my heart. Then I’d wonder, What would it be like to have a man like him who spends time with my children?
At night, when my sweethearts were tucked into bed and I sat alone until my eyes were heavy, my mind would wander to women whose husbands were cuddling with them. If my husband was home every night, life would be so perfect.
Then I met Mr. Perfect. Sometimes he had a name. Other times he was a conglomeration of all the perfect men in my world. My comparisons of him and my husband always found my spouse on the losing end.
Mr. Perfect didn’t snore, leave underwear lying around, or get tired. He always had extra energy for me and our kids, dressed fashionably and never passed gas.
Gradually, I realized my discontent with my husband came from comparing him to other men and Mr. Perfect–-the man in my mind.
I confessed this sin to God, and committed to live a pure life, even in my mind. Something changed in our marriage. My husband seemed more attractive. I was able to see strengths in him that I’d not seen in a long time. I confessed my sin to my husband, received his forgiveness and our marriage flourished. I grew spiritually.
Is there a man in your mind? Are you comparing your husband to Mr. Perfect? Are you ready to confess your discontentment about your marriage or your covetous thoughts about another man, even if it’s just the man in your mind?
“You must not covet your neighbor’s house. You must not covet your neighbor’s wife, male or female servant, ox or donkey, or anything else that belongs to your neighbor.” Exodus 20:17 (NLT)