Emotional Submission: Do You Say Yes When You Mean No?

Aster Daisies

Do you say yes when you mean no? Some spouses struggle with the problem of emotional submission. This is a different issue from spiritual submission. Spiritual submission is a positive act of voluntarily yielding in love. Emotional submission is a negative act of saying yes when you really mean no. Emotional submission is often driven by fear of rejection or displeasing someone. It results in a spouse giving in to things they inwardly find offensive, painful or sinful. Freedom from {Read More}

My {Un} Kind Home

twins

It’s easy for me to show kindness to friends, acquaintances, and even strangers. It’s harder for me to show kindness to the people I live with day in and day out.  It seems like my patience often runs thin—especially with my children. Constant arguing, fighting, and yelling—it all gets to me, and too often I react in unkind ways.  Lately and not coincidentally—I’m sure, Colossians 3:21 has been on my mind: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children….” Chances are if {Read More}

Showing Kindness in Marriage

Les & Page Hughes / photo courtesy of Page Hughes

“Is there anything I can do for you today?” My husband often asks me that question. I don’t usually have anything for him to do, but just that he asked means a lot to me. He is so good at practicing kindness. In a marriage kindness is a critical key. It is about thinking about the other person before yourself and about how to actively participate in someone else’s life to make it better for them. Then you actually do {Read More}

Keeping a Journal for My Daughter

Black and White little girl looking down by Chloe Virginia for MentoringMoments.org

I gave birth to our fifth child a few months after my 40th birthday.  She was the first girl to be born into my husband’s family in almost 70 years, and her arrival greatly altered the landscape in what was once “boy kingdom.”  There are many things I look forward to doing with her and for her, such as holding tea parties, teaching her to cook, star gazing, and playing dolls together. Most importantly, I want to pass on to {Read More}

Peaceful Grandparenting: An Atmosphere of Worship

grandmother2

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God” (Matthew 5:9).“What is peace?” I asked my husband. But before he could answer I said jokingly, “Is it when the grandkids go home?””No,” he replied quickly. “It’s too quiet when they’re gone.” I’m grateful my husband enjoys spending time with our grandkids and that he’s a real peacemaker. We both love quiet, peaceful surroundings, so we try to prevent squabbles when our grandkids visit. Of course, that isn’t {Read More}

Making Peace with My Parenting Past

beach1

Mother’s Day is just around the corner, as is my birthday. This is the time I usually drag out my big bag of regrets about my multiple mammoth, mortifying parenting mistakes. I take out each memory and pain, one by one, hold it up and turn it around, examining every facet. My kids are grown and out on their own. The memories of words said and blunders made trickle into my thoughts. The trickle picks up speed until a flood {Read More}

Living Together Before Marriage

shadows

Just because our culture has changed to see no shame in living together before marriage, does not mean that God has changed his inerrant Word. “Every word of God proves true; He is a shield to those who take refuge in him.” Proverbs 30:5  What’s wrong with living together first, before marriage? 1. Living together first is becoming the norm rather than the exception in our society. 2. Even some who identify themselves as Christians are following this trend. If {Read More}

Book Review: When Couples Pray Together

when couples pray together

Over the past 45 years, my husband and I have read numerous books together to strengthen our marriage. One favorite was When Couples Pray Together by family counselors David and Jan Stoop. We identified with the authors’ early struggles to pray with each other. Jan yearned for spiritual intimacy with Dave, but he resisted when she suggested they join in prayer. Problems like theirs are not uncommon. Informal statistics reveal only 4 percent of Christian couples actually pray together on {Read More}

Help! My Husband is Gone all the Time!

Mom helping

On the first few days my husband was gone for business, the kids and I would do some fun things. We ate special meals. We watched fun movies. Sometimes I’d let the kids sleep in Papa’s spot in our bed. Then life returned to normal, and for a week or two everything would go smoothly. After a few weeks though, I’d be tired. The kids would miss their dad more–especially if he called and talked with them. Bedtimes became tear-fests, {Read More}

Patience in Marriage

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“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23 I sent a survey out asking 50 wives which fruit of the Spirit they wanted to work on most in their marriage in 2013. 1. Love 2. Joy 3. Peace 4. Patience 5. Kindness 6. Goodness 7. Faithfulness 8. Gentleness 9. Self-control The top answer of 26 wives who responded was patience. While I won’t {Read More}