Mentoring Moments for Christian Women » Women of God

What It Takes To Be a Mentor

Carla Anne — Tue, 15 May 2012 10:00:51 +0000

Women often ask me to mentor them in their marriages. The marriage road has been rocky for us – we’re the first to admit that – but we keep at it with persistent determination. These women know I will be honest with them, and that I will challenge them. But I will not ask them to do things I am not willing to do myself.

Mentors are not preachers, and are more than just teachers. Mentors are those who are willing to live honest and vulnerable lives, sharing both the good and the bad. They need to be willing to listen to the stories that need to be told and give encouragement. But it can’t stop there.

Mentors need to give direction, speak frankly and be honest about the state their mentee is in. A mentor who applauds poor behavior in an effort to encourage is doing more harm than good. When she refuses to challenge sin in an area of her mentee’s life, she has compounded the problem and become part of it.

There are times and places to be silent, for sure. And we want to make sure we are giving only a little bit to work on at a time. Overwhelming someone with changes they need to make is not productive. But neither is avoiding delicate issues.

Before you agree to mentor someone, be sure you are on track with God. Your time with the Lord is paramount. Without the power of the Holy Spirit moving in you and giving you wisdom, anything you say, any exercises you assign, any stories you tell will be wasted. Unless you are fully submitted to Jesus Christ on a daily basis, you will not be in a position to challenge a sinful lifestyle or attitude.

“How can you think of saying, ‘Friend, let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.” (Luke 6:42, NLT)

Carla Anne Coroy

Written Into the Story

Guest — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 10:00:28 +0000

Ever since Adam and Eve, God has been writing earth’s most passionate and powerful drama, a narrative from ancient past to triumphant future, a tale of redemption and hope. Most amazing of all, God is writing you and me into His story.

Consider this—has anyone ever understood their place in history? Surely Abraham knew. God promised him he’d be the father of many nations, but all he experienced of the blessing was the miracle of a child born in his old age. Did he even live long enough to meet his grandsons, Esau and Jacob?

In Luke we read about the thief on the cross. Everyone around him cursed the man crucified next to him. Suddenly we hear him say, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” In his greatest moment of humiliation and shame, the thief only knew death’s agony, clueless that the faith his dying words expressed would shout a message of hope down through the ages. Because God wrote him into the story, we believe that it’s never too late to repent.

What about modern examples? Christian Wolfke prayed for years that he might win a Jew for Christ even though there were none in his Romanian village, and he was too ill to travel. When Richard and Sabrina Wurmbrand arrived, the old carpenter prayed many hours for their salvation, gave them a New Testament and eventually won them to Christ.

This Jewish couple later stood up to the communist government and, after suffering many years in prison for his faith, Richard wrote the well-known book, Tortured for Christ, and founded Voice of the Martyrs. Christian Wolfkes only saw himself as a carpenter who wanted to win a Jew to Christ. He never lived to see how his investment in the Wurmbrands later impacted the world.

What about you and me? We’re just as ordinary and unsuspecting as these folks, but our faithfulness may also reverberate down through the ages in ways we could never imagine. If today we’re perplexed by our lives, should this be surprising? We’re all part of a greater story which the Author has not yet finished.

When at last all plot lines in the Great Author’s story converge, all mysteries are solved, and the lovers finally wed, I’m convinced we’ll let out a deep sigh of satisfaction and maybe wipe a tear or two from our eyes. Then I imagine we’ll slip to our knees in stunned awe…

Ruth Wood writes at www.Comfort-Cafe.net/blog. She is married, has two grown sons, a delightful daughter-in-law and one rambunctious grandcat.

My Way

Guest — Fri, 09 Mar 2012 10:00:11 +0000

”…never the less not as I will, but as You will.” [Matthew 26:39]

Recently I was asked, “What has it cost you to grow as a Christian”?

I thought for a few moments, taking a quick trip back down the highway of life, remembering a multitude of decision places. Places that at the time were fraught with painful struggles and unending what if reasoning. It didn’t take too long however, before I realized I had to respond with, “my will”.

Many times I just simply wanted my own way! I have journeyed enough now to realize how many times the Lord has saved me from having ”my own way.” I wasn’t really struggling with having to make a big decision, I was struggling with letting go and allowing God to be God!

Oswald Chambers pens spiritual growth in these words, “Spiritual reality is what is wanted, “I surrender all” and you feel as if you did, that is the awkward thing. The point is whether, as God engineers your circumstances you find that you really have surrendered. Immediately you do surrender, you are made so much one with your Lord that the thought of what it cost never enters any more.” Receiving the life of Christ into your heart is the story of redeeming Grace…living in His heart is the process of self-denial.

Today remember you are a child of God, do it His way and keep in mind Jesus said; “I came that they might have life…more abundantly!”

Diane M. Hale For the past 30 years, Diane has served as evangelist, trainer, teacher, mentor, and consultant for churches of many denominations.

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Gentle and Quiet

Chloe Virginia — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 10:00:57 +0000

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Giving Grace

Guest — Fri, 02 Mar 2012 10:00:54 +0000

“We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves.” {Romans 15:1]

It was one of those moments that you wish could last forever—evening was closing in as dusk dimmed the light of day. I stood in the garden enjoying the cool breeze of evening when suddenly a young doe leaped across the road, then turned and stood watching the way she had come. My eyes followed her gaze and there on the other side of the road was a tiny fawn—it caught my breath—so small just hours old, struggling to move from the ditch at the side of the road, onto the pavement. Using the leverage of her front hoofs the tiny fawn made it but was afraid, confused and wasn’t sure which way to go, but she followed the trail her mother had left. I watched with deep awe and fascination at this creature of God—her beauty—frailty and gentleness.

Later while sharing the story with Joe, he said the little fawn was born able to stand up—to walk—to see and because God created it without a body odor it was safe from predators… for a season. Unlike humans who are born unable to walk, see only after a season and cannot talk or take care of themselves—yet we are His highest creation. We are born to need God and to grow and grasp the value of life and each other.

Many are struggling to defeat the ditches of life and they need someone—we receive cries for help almost daily and the little fawn reminded me of one I received just yesterday a cry that said…I’m desperately needing help. I don’t want to return to the old-life—can you help me?

If you are strong it is because someone has helped you overcome the ditches and defeats of life. Watch and listen for the cries today and share your strength with those who are struggling.

Diane M. Hale
For the past 30 years, Diane has served as evangelist, trainer, teacher, mentor, and consultant for churches of many denominations.

Encouraging Hope

Laura — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 10:00:39 +0000

Recently I received some very discouraging and disappointing news. It weighed heavy upon my heart and mind. I had no answers. Later, at work I tried to hide my emotions, but when a young man asked if I was all right I broke down in tears. He said he was sorry and left the room. Later another man from his office came to my door and said he had something for me. He placed a piece of Goetz’s Caramel Cream candy in my hand with specific instructions on how to savor it. He said this would brighten my day.

We are to bear one another’s burdens! “Now we who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and not just please ourselves. Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification. For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached you fell on me.” For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, so that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope. Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus, so that with one accord you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.” Romans 15:1-6 NASB

How do you bear burdens? Perseverance begins with being in the Word; our faith is based upon the sufficiency of the Scriptures. A believer’s strength comes only through Christ (Phil. 4:13).

“How sweet are Your words to my taste! Yes, sweeter than honey to my mouth! (Psalm 119:103 NASB). This is the encouraging hope we have to share.

Laura Leathers

Words of Wisdom: Olympia Morata, Her Talents for His Glory

Guest — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 10:00:06 +0000

[NOTE: Often when we hear “mentoring,” we only think of the one-on-one kind. However, it struck me recently that I had been mentored by many women who never knew my name. I heard them speak or read their books and through their words, they mentored me. This series which will be posted occasionally includes some of the lessons we can learn when we receive Words from the Wise.]

Though born a woman, womanly things I have left behind:
Yarn, the shuttle, threads of the loom, and baskets.
It is the flowery meadow of the Muses I admire,
And the cheerful choral dances of double-crested Parnassus.
Perhaps other women are pleased with other things,
But these are my glory, and these are my joy.

These lines from a poem by Olympia Morata (1526 – 1555) are, under various translations, her best known work and have been quoted by some as an early feminist proclamation. I have included them in my historical semi-fiction, Weight of a Flame, because they represent one phase of her life, but I don’t consider them a feminist statement, for various reasons.

First of all, we can’t impose on the past categories that did not exist or had different connotations than they have today. Secondly, Olympia did not write these words in protest against inequality between the sexes. She was at that time a teenage girl trying to please her father and teachers, who encouraged her to cultivate her outstanding academic talents, exchanging, as one of them wrote, “the pen for the distaff, books for house linens, and writing exercises for needle-work.”

Probably Olympia didn’t mind leaving these women’s pastimes behind. She may have been proud of her unique abilities, but when her world was suddenly turned upside down, she lamented that she had neglected what was really important – the knowledge of God. As God allowed her to continue to use her talents, she saw them in a different light: “When I considered the matter over and over again as diligently as possible, I could find no other reason for me to work at these studies other than ‘it lay at the feet of God.’”

As we consider the many different situations Olympia encountered in her life, we can say that, when the occasion called, she ran her household well. When her health forced her to hire outside help, she took care to find a dependable person. When her younger brother was entrusted in her care, she acquired a book on godly child-rearing.

Her literary accomplishments remained outstanding and received great recognition, but she learned to keep them in the right perspective, holding God’s glory and the benefit of His church foremost in her mind. Her last poem expresses well what her focus had become.

I long to be fade away, so great is my confidence in Christ,
and to be with Him in whom my life thrives.

Weight of a Flame, The Passion of Olympia Morata

Simonetta Carr, a mother of eight, is the author of the ongoing series of
Christian Biographies for Young Readers published by RHB and of the young adult historical fiction Weight of a Flame, published by P&R. You may read more about her and her books on her blog: simonettacarr.com.

Growing Day by Day

Mentoring Moments — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 10:00:06 +0000

Believers, if you would have an increase of happiness in Christ’s service, labor every year to grow in grace. Beware of standing still. The holiest men are always the happiest. Let your aim be every year to be more holy–to know more, to feel more, to see more of the fullness of Christ. Do not rest on old grace: do not be content with the degree of Christianity which you have attained. Search the Scriptures more earnestly; pray more fervently; hate sin more; mortify self-will more; become more humble the nearer you draw to your end; seek more direct personal communion with the Lord Jesus; strive to be more like Enoch– daily walking with God; keep your conscience clear of little sins; grieve not the Spirit; avoid arguments and disputes about the lesser matters of religion: lay more firm hold upon those great truths, without which no man can be saved. Remember and practice these things, and you will be more happy.

J.C. Ryle in Practical Religion

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New Year’s Resolution: Share the Message of Hope

Laura — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 10:00:48 +0000

Around the month of November there is a nudge in my heart to start thinking about a spiritual theme for the New Year. What does the Lord want to teach me through His Word? How will He work through my life to encourage others in their relationship with Him?

In October I was preparing for a women’s retreat, A Cup of Hope, based upon Romans 15:13. As I studied and prepared for this retreat I knew I had much to learn about the word hope. For example, I never thought about the theology of hope, nor have I ever thought about having an attitude of hope. From this retreat came the following spiritual theme:

Christ in me, the Hope of glory, through my life may others see.

Throughout the days of 2012, sharing this Good News: His Only Purpose: Eternity.

This hope is not based upon the definition found in Webster’s Dictionary. This hope describes something that is certain, but not yet realized. This Hope is based upon “Christ Jesus, who is our hope,” (1 Timothy 1:1b). He purchased salvation for mankind on the cross and it is this hope which will lead to the glory of God.

Those who do not know Christ are living in hopelessness. Jesus Christ is the answer for those living in hopelessness and the Word is the Good News we have to share. Paul writes, “Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have obtained our introduction by faith into this grace in which we stand; and we exult in hope of the glory of God. And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us” (Romans 5:1-5 NASB).

Will you join me this year as we learn together how to share the message of Hope to a lost and dying world?

Laura Leathers

A Brand New Calendar

Ann — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 10:00:11 +0000

I love a new calendar, and I especially enjoy finding one with a fun theme and bright illustrations. I look at the empty, fresh white squares and check when Christmas falls, write in vacation dates, and anticipate first and last days of school.

Then when December 31st, is over, I save my calendar because it reads like a book with a plot sometimes planned, but other times filled with surprises and hastily scribbled detours. The settings change and the characters grow. Sorting through all the activities, I may even find a theme. I hope it’s rich with love and commitment to what is important: faith, family, and friendship.

Some squares are filled with scribbles, fine print squished into what little white space remained. Too much of everything. Did I ever pause?

And then I think of Thornton Wilder’s play Our Town. In Act III, Emily’s departed spirit returns home during her own funeral. Given the opportunity to relive one day of her life in Grovers Corner, she chooses her 12^th birthday. But instead of experiencing joy, Emily finds, “We don’t have time to look at one another.” Commenting on how fast life goes, she declares, “Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it–every, every minute?”

The Psalms contain verses that echo Emily’s sentiments. “Show me Lord, my life’s end and the number of my days and let me know how fleeting my life is” (Psalm 39:4) and “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12).

Perhaps, like Emily and the psalmist, when we jot notes on the calendar square, we should number each day, appreciate and wonder at the gift of it. And most of all, pray to gain a heart of wisdom as we value its “every, every minute.”